Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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How many light bulbs? 1

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops