How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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