Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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How did the black man manage to get that 42 inch TV? He had been working a lot of overtime at work to try and treat his wife and kids.

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Q: What did the lesbian say to her partner? A: We cannot get married in forty five states.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops