Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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Black people don't exist. Their skin is rather of a brown tone.

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

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what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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