Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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Sloths

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Y couldn't you stop the bowling ball? Because it was going down a hill.

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Gays always seem happy wonder why Straights complain to much

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? A: Ow.

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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