What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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whats black and large -me

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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Roses are red viloets are blue mw3 sucks and bf3 is good

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

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A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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Chuck Norris.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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