Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Animal

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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Womens Basketball.

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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I'm funny.

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A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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