What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't the farmer shot him before he could have a chance at freedom.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

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mexicans fishing

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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Beka has AIDS

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I can't see ~ Ray Charles

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

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What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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