A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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