A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

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Knock-knock. There is no reply. The burglar makes sure no one is home and breaks into a side window. After stealing some precious jewelry and family valuables, he exits through the same window.

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A black man got sentenced go prison for stealing a car. He didn't do it.

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the mean terrorist said "i am going to kill your mother" that mother is now dead

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What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

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Q: What did the black guy say to the white guy? A: Nothing, he's a mute.

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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What did the Big Chimney say to the Little Chimney? Nothing, chimneys are unable to talk.

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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The awkward moment when you have cancer.

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Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

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what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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