An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens don't have the cognitive capacity to reason. So you'd never know

Your gay

carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

YOU

Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

charlie sheen

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding two worms. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Dying from cancer.

My Boyfriend

What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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