> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

Your mother is so fat.

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

Jane asked her husband why he was crying, he replied "Because i have extremely agressive cancer" hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....Cancer

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

baskets

Yo mama so fat, i rolled over twice and i still on that bitch.

pee

Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

What do you get when you eat a bag of potatoes? The're all gone.

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

Hit me and kick me were on a log. Hit me fell off, swan to shore, and went home.

How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

A man breaks into your house points a gun at your head and proceeds to fire a blank... The man stares at your for another minute before jumping back out of the window he crawled in from and sitting on the curb outside your house rethinking his life choices.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? To get to the other side.

almost as accidental as your spelling im afraid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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