What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOIT ARE BLUE MY NAME IS MISIMOA AND I SMELL LIKE POO

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Q: What is black, white and red all over? A: Interracial sex during the time which the bible has decreed as abhoration.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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I had a friend named Joshua, he died of AIDs, cancer, and several other diseases.

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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A man wins 1 million dollars on the pokies. He goes home and tells his wife and kids about the big win. The next day the man goes go the casino and and loses the 1 million as he is addicted to gambling

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Whats black, white and dusty? A nuns fan-y because it never gets used

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I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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What do you call a person who kills a black? A black man

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Why was the black guy convicted of a crime he didnt commit? Because in The American social syste

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Girl: Want to stay over at mine tonight? Guy: Yeah I'd love to! Girl: Tough, you can't

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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follow @nils_kosmo on twatter hehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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