1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

Women's Rights.

A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

How do you kill a blonde? Choke her.

Your mom is not fat!

Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

Why was the 13 year old drug addict crying? Because somebody shot him in the foot

Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

Fox News

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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