How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a Polar bear in an Igloo.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down +21

69

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +21

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Moooo

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops