how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

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Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

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42

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Erron, who the hell do you work for? I thought we where friends, allies! We have not done anything illegal ever!

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops