What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

How do you get a Blonde to brake her nosebone? You put your dick under a glastable! QQ

Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black.

Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

I'm sn otter

I dyslexic man walks into a bra. This incident had no relation whatsoever to his condition. The bra was just in an unusual and inconvenient location, and he wasn't paying much attention to where he was going.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

long in the tooth!

My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

Has u seen my grammar?

what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

Whats wrong with that Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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