- Anti Joke

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

Roses are red. My name is dave. This poem makes no sense. Microwave.

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Depends. Some are vegetarians or vegans, while most eat a mixture of vegetables and meat.

Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

How do you tell the difference between a pig and a sea pig? If you open your mouth and it fills with water, you are an idiot

What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS! Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

who ever is reading this....

Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller