Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

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Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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civil rights

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gun store to buy a gun. After years of abuse and mockery, he was tired of being called "chicken", and was going to shoot up the entire school

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

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What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops