A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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What is black but also yellow? A song.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Stewie: MOM! MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! Lois: WHAT!!! Stewie: Hi, hehehehehehe. Family Guy -Louis

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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Two english guys meet at work

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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who likes fried chicken? almost everyone because fried chicken is delicious

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What do you call a black man with cancer? A very unfourtunate man.

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whats a worse movie than saw I don't know my mom won't let me watch any

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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