did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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SCHNARRRRRR!!!!!

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i like pie.

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having enough money to buy an apple.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

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A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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This comment has been removed for too many average votes.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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