- Anti Joke

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

what did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for easter AIDS

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

My great grandfather died in the holocaust. He fell off the guard tower.

SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

How many black guys does it take to change a lighbulb idk, you cant see its dark

Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26