I'm gay. No homo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

whos a tramp and stinks? David Bell

What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

Penis

Knock knock. Death.

Justin Bieber having an erection.

An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 killed 9.

What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

Why were there teeth marks in the guys arm? He bit himself

Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

Boy: Mum... I got a hundred marks! Mother: That's good my son! Which subject was it? Boy: 30 for maths, 40 for english, and 30 for science.

What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

What's the difference between a man and a woman? One has a penis, and one has a vagina.

HEy Hey Hey! Lakers are so going to bounce back!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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