A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

thumb_up thumb_down +7

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

fart+fart=poop

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What sucks? A: Straws

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An old lady walks into a bar. She was the janitor.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where's my shotgun

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

If we all evolved from apes. Abbie didnt go that far

thumb_up thumb_down +5

mc hammers income.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a black man with his doctorate in the field of marine biology? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops