What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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what happens when you have A.D.D.? you're EXTREMELY annoying

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What did I do last night?work

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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What"s the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

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Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

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A man with no legs walks into a bar.

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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