I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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A kid walked into a bar, but was kicked out immediately as state law mandates you must be 21 to be withing 12 feet of an operable bar.

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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what happend when the car hit the wall? it exploded and 4 people were injured, 2 were bystanders

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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involved parents.

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There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

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Like my post because I have no friends And then don't like it

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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what is pink stinky? your butthole lol

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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Knock Knock whose there? child abuse...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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I met an Asian man in Beijing, and he had very small feet. You know why? He was a midget.

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

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How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops