- Anti Joke

What's worse than finding twelve dead babies nailed to a tree? One living baby nailed to twelve trees.

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, and mute child get for his birthday? Nothing, his parents hate him.

I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

What do you call a man with no legs and arms hanging on your wall? Art

Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels