Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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A black goes to college

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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Kittens.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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