Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

Why did the koala fall out of the tree ... Because it was dead

Small titties.

I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

Q:"Wanna Here a Joke?" A:"Yea Sure" Q:"Why can't Stevie Wonder read?" A:"Umm....because he's blind?" Q:"No, because he's black."

Whats the difference........ between a duck?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

My children are mistakes

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

Connor "Rusty" McLeod

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

Jack and Jill climb a tall hill to get some water from the well for there farther who has been working in the fields. Jack trips and hits his hell on a rock and Jill promptly calls 911 and stays with him until help arrives.

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

what do you call a cup?... a cup

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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