Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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