Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops