Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

people magazine

Sarah Palin's political campaign

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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