A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

united we sit, cause we're fat

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

No

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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