why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

I'm HIV positive.

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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