Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -61

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

thumb_up thumb_down -83

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

thumb_up thumb_down +88

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

thumb_up thumb_down +62

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops