What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

Rick Perry.

The Bible

Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

45.

The Mets win the World Series

Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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