What's funny to laugh at dying? JEWS!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I had a lemon. hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than the Holocaust? Voldemort

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I had 99 problems Solved them all

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Jimmy has nine bags of sugar. He eats nine bags of sugar. What doeshe have now? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walked into a bar owch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops