I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

Feminism

Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...