A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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666

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Popsicles

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops