A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

AND

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Neil is a reterd.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

that krista chich from the below joke accepted me as a friend, then she blocked me. haha WOW, she realy is a bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops