How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

It's funny that Melo and Garnett are going to be on the same Allstar team

Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

Q: What happened to the dog when he eat the banana? A: he got raped by a monkey...

Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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