So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

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So one time there was this woman learning...

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

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69

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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