what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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boys

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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haha black people :D

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A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

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What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

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So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Two muffins are cooling on a windowsill. One muffin says to the other "It sure is a beautiful day today." The other muffin says "Holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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