What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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dyslexic's Untie

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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