You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

42

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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