Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

Alan: My Grandfather has a jacket made from jews that he killed while he was in the SS. James: Really? Alan: No, I'm Korean. My Grandfather would not be allowing into the SS.

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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