Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

Q. Why did the man die? A. Natural Causes

Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

black people

today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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