How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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I'm Coming

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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Three tomatoes were walking down the street, a daddy, a mummy and a baby and...wait did I say tomatoes, sorry, I meant people.

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My friend who's a chef was stabbed by his own kitchen knife, everyone said it would be in bad taste to joke about it.

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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Bob Saget that is all

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holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

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why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

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What is full of water and drowning people A pool

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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Wanna know what's funny? A joke.

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Why does annie put 2 balls together? bacuse its makes a BUTT! oo

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What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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