A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

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Q: How do you make sweet sexy love to cow and make her come several times and then have her lick your stick clean without nobody ever finding out? While secretly keeping her as your girlfriend forever? A: Wouldn't you like to know...

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Why did the old man drop his milk? He had a stroke.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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