What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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What does the rubbish do when it is depressed? It breaks down.

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roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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This couple is having the most passionate sex ever one night, and the guy cums before he gets a chance to pull out. He gets the woman pregnant. Now they are married.

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What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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